Inevitability, a sense of knowing what will happen, really takes the the wind out of my sails. When I have convinced myself that I know the ending of a show, a book, or an election cycle, I tune all the way out. This summer so far has been a reminder to me that being caught unaware, being taken aback, not knowing everything, can not only be refreshing but necessary. With the election shaken up, I find myself listening to podcasts again, engaged and energized. I’ve been lucky enough to travel, and the coast of Mallorca awed me in a way that I didn’t expect. The lemon trees! The spangly ocean at sunset! A girl I have been working with couldn’t read English when we started together last year. I had to force every time we read, and I was feeling not great about her chances as a high school senior. You guys, she just asked me to take her to get a library card and said she’s been enjoying reading over the summer. How nice it is to feel like things are possible, like you might not know the outcome. Like this sunset might possibly be the most beautiful one ever in the history of the world.
And, look, maybe your life is full of surprises and twists and you’re thinking I’m nuts. But I think some of us get in places of feeling like things already in motion are unavoidable. Predictable. Broken even. It’s a form of self protection to tell yourself you know everything. Dependability can make you feel like you’re safe, but, paradoxically, knowing everything can also lead to a sense of powerlessness in that things will happen with or without you. Wonder and awe can be an antidote to this. You have to be present, checked in, engaged, to notice the awe-inspiring details of life. Pay attention or you’ll miss it.
There are, evidently, eight types of awe according to psychologist Dacher Keltner. I challenged myself to come up with an example of each from my life recently:
Moral Beauty - This is just every post my mom sends me on IG from @goodnews_movement.
Collective effervescence- The Olympics, bay-bay! I am not a sports person or a team person, but the collective experience of watching athletes compete has been so so great.
Nature- We had an incredible and unexpected storm in Austin yesterday. I was in the lake when it happened and just hunkered in the water, in awe of how fast things changed and the dramatic sky.
Music - Celine Dion singing at the opening ceremonies of the Olympics.
Visual design, art, and architecture - The light through the stained glass windows of Sagrada Familia in Barcelona.
Spirituality, mysticism, and religion - I’ve recently drifted to an Episcopal church. Letting myself get used to new rhythms and new ways of relating to God have been refreshing and healing.
Life and death - “It is a miracle to be born, and it is a miracle to die” (source). Being with aging family humbles me and slows me down like nothing else.
Epiphany - Imma get back to you on this one. I’m sure there is one I just need to be present to…
Make a list for yourself! Or just pay attention to moments of awe, wonder and beauty in your life this week. It strikes me that these are things that can never be taken from us. At least one of these things can exist in almost any circumstance - in war or sickness or captivity. When my grandfather had dementia, he would come back to himself when he heard music from his youth. Visiting people in detention in Bangkok when I lived there, I was able to see how a prayer would restore light into people’s eyes. When I watch scenes from Gaza captured by filmmakers I work with at ConnectHER, moral beauty abounds in impossibly difficult circumstances. People are caring for each other in ways that make me weep. You can even be sitting in your bed scrolling Instagram, completely moved by a video of a young man in awe of music and the love of his family.
The end result of all this awe, we hope, is feeling more connected to the universe, each other and ourselves. I’ve seen this quote making the rounds on many people’s Instagram stories. Georgia O’Keefe wrote in a letter to a friend:
I have done nothing all summer but wait for myself to be myself again.
What a gift summer can be to change up your routine, see things in a new way and listen to yourself. Presence, holding yourself in a moment long enough to marvel at how you are here and you are you is a gift to yourself and those around you. This is a monthly (sometimes) checkin about (mostly) giving. I believe that sharing what awes you, inviting people into awe and wonder, is one of the most generous things you can do. Giving money is easy. Truly. Go give to Gazans and it will take 2 minutes. Give to anything you care about right now. I’ll wait.
Giving your presence and attention to your kids, to your elders, to your community, is where the joy is. Sharing your sense of awe in God, the universe, art, beauty, whatever you’re able to see right now, is the thing. And it keeps us engaged in hope, ever a worthwhile endeavor.
I think this is how we are supposed to be in the world — present and in awe. Anne Lamott
Here for it
Crying on planes to sports documentaries — If you love the Olympics, you’ll love watching Giannis: The Marvelous Journey and We Dare to Dream about athletes who achieved incredible things despite their citizenship status.
Crystal Bridges - When I tell people I went to Arkansas to see art, the responses are either “Arkansas?!” or “Crystal Bridges is AWESOME.” IYKYK.
This interview — Melinda Gates is shaking up philanthropy and I love it. When she clapped back and said “They use their voice and they use their megaphones, but I would not call those men philanthropists,” I was screaming. Remember to always ask for receipts.
Cardamom ice cream - I made this after having an cardamom affogato and even cardamom water while traveling recently. What else can I add cardamom to…
